Stress during the Holidays…
Holidays are the times of great joy and also great stress for many people.
I am speaking today about the stress of gatherings, families together.
The stress may that uncle, that friend, the sister, the obnoxious brother in law, the mother in law…always someone right?
I am going to invite you to make whoever that person is, the one who annoys you, the one who is rude or the one who is loud your yoga, yes, make him or her your spiritual practice. Why?
Because you have the power to create new experiences, different experiences for yourself and even others. If you show up being the same person you were in the last holiday dinner, you may have the exact stressful same situation.
Do you want to have a new experience, shift the energy in the room, try these practices:
Spiritual Practice #1:
You have the incredible power to change your energy and your emotional state.
Ask yourself, before the gathering, who do I want to be?
How do you want to show up? What would be in alignment with love?
Most likely you will think compassion, patience, empathy…
Rehearse it and show up with those qualities. You won’t be perfect, it is not about being perfect, it is about showing up in love. Do your best.
Spiritual Practice #2:
Choose happiness over righteousness.
Yes I know, that individual thinks he knows everything, it is annoying. I have that one in my table as well.
Listen, observe and be curious. Don’t judge, don’t defend, don’t prove anything. Respect other’s models of the world.
Stay in your body, calm, centered and collected.
Spiritual practice #3:
See this person as a teacher - your yoga.
Ask yourself, what is about this person that triggers me? What do I feel when I am triggered by him/her?
Be more interested in the process inside you than the person. During this particular practice you will find that there is a need inside you that isn’t being met by this person. And truth to be told, it is not his job to meet your needs, it is yours. And you probably have wonderful people in your life that can meet those needs. Use the challenge as an opportunity for growth.
Spiritual Practice #4:
Be in the present moment through your breath.
Reactions are automatic behaviors that come from our deep seated wounds, beliefs and trauma.
Because you want to show up as a different person, you need to be present, conscious so your ego - the reactive mind does not highjack you. Avoid the rumination of past stories, past narratives of the last holidays. Don’t bring the past with you!
A final thought…
Move in life with the assumption that no one will change, unless they want to. You change and the world will start reflecting back to you that change.
And remember, as an adult, you can always walk out of a situation that becomes unhealthy and unsafe. That is self love and self preservation.
Choose connection, love, joy, compassion and your holidays may just get better!
Peace and joy, Alex.